Maitrin

Shree

Roj phakta reply kari swata: hun na mail kari
kam ase tari "missed call" dei tich maitrin

lapavoon thevi "affair" kaloo na dei "priyakar"
samaje mala "mitra" hechi "pramanpatra"

Ashach aamachya maitrini janu mhaishasurmardini
aamhi kayam mahishasur aani "Boyfriend" tyanche pati

ashich aamachi maitri chirantan chaloo rahi
maitri che gulabpani aamachya vari preamacha paus "dusarayavari"

lave aaplyalaa hurhur udhe vicharanche kahur
ashich hi pakhar MITRA mhane

Sadhugiri

7 sadhus 7 chatai per dhyaan lagakar baithe the……….
Ek Aadmi aata hain aur sabse bujurg sadhu ko Pranam kar poochta hain..."Maharaj ladki nahi pat rahi hai.. kya Karu...?"
Woh sadhu sabse chote sadhu ko pukarta hain...aur kehtaa hain
……………………………..
………………………..
" Chotu ek aur chatai laga de beta...."

JGF Requirement

Applications are invited for the following post. The package and incentives are mentioned below.
Designation : junior girl friend ( trainee )
Experience : 2 guys ( One in Pune , One academic - during college )
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Perks and incentives.
Total gross ( Monthly ) : 3 gifts worth 300/-
30 bike rides each duration 2 hours
20 trips to FC Road
10 Kulfis / Chokobars at a regular gap of 3 days
Daily Provision of Mircha Bonda / Aloo Bonda / Pakoda worth of 5 /-
4 movies ( Hindi Family movie only ) per month on every weekend at E-SQUARE/INOX
Visits to MG road and Shopper's Stop every Weekend
Pair of Jeans or T-shirts according to Demand
Net Deductions ( Monthly ) : Provident Fund and Service taxes to be informed on joining
The probation period is 6 months, after which confirmation (with promotion to Regular Girlfriend) will be given based on the requirement.
Pls note

Fundu Joke

This is when Amitabh Bachan got fit after his long illness.....

one fine morning he told his drvier "Arre bhai aaj Gaadi hum

chalayenge..".

Driver: "Par saab aapki tabyat?.."

Amitabh: "Aree meri tabyat thik ho gayi he, I am fit and fine...kya dance karke dikhau, dialogue, fighting kare dikhau.....Hain"

Ok then he starts driving the car very fast.... zoooooooooom

breaks one red signal.........

breaks second red signal..........

breaks on more red signal...........

Then a traffic hawaldar stops the car, tells the driver to move the car to the roadside.

Hawaldar: "Chalo liscence dikhao, puc, gaadi ke kagjaaat..."

Sees Amitabh and says, "are Amitabh Bachhan?!!!" he is verysuprised to see him.......

Then he quickly on wireless calls his senior officers....

Hawaldar: "Sir, aap jaldi yaha aye naake par..."

Sir: "Kyun kya hua??"

Havaldar: "Sir ek gaadi ne signal toda he aur maine us gaadi ko side me rakha he"

Sir: "To phir?"

Hawaldar: "SIr, Us gaadi ka maalik bahut bada aadmi he sir .... mein uska challan nahi phaad sakta aap khud yaha aiye .."

Sir: "KON MAALIK HE US GAADI KA??"

HAWALDAR : "WOH TO PATA NAHI SIR PAR USNE NE HE NA SIR ... AMITABH BACHHAN KO DRIVER RAKHA HAI....".

♥ दिसतं तस नसतं, म्हनुन जग फ़सतं ♥

♥ दिसतं तस नसतं, म्हनुन जग फ़सतं ♥
स्वत: सदैव रडवून दुसरय़ाला नेहमी हसवायचं असतं
आपल्या ईच्छा मनात ठेवून दुसरय़ाचं कौतुक करायचं असतं
मनातले चेहरय़ावर कधी आनायचं नसतं
कारण असे करुनच दुसरयाचे मन फुलवायचं असतं
दुसरयासाठी राब राब राबयचं असतं
आनी स्वत:च्या जीवाचे मात्र राण करायचं असतं
एवढं करुनही आपल्याला कुनी समजुन घेत नसतं
कारन सर्वानाच आपापले स्वार्थ साधायचं असतं
आपल्य ईच्छेचा खुन करायला कुनीही तयार असतं
आनी आपलं मन मात्र दुसरय़ासाठी सदैव तयार असतं
पन दुसरय़ाचं भलं करुनही नेहमी आपलचं चुकीचं दिसतं
आनी दुसरय़ाचं मन आपल्याला पाहुन खुदकनं हसतं
पन एकांतात आपलं मन किती रडत असतं
कारन एकांत नसतांना ते सर्वासाठीच हसतं
आनी म्हनुनच हे सर्व जनसमुहाला माहीत असतंकी
दिसतं तस नसतं, म्हनुनच जग फ़सतं

Genie in The Bottle and Project Manager

Three men: a project manager, a software engineer, and a hardware engineer are helping out on a project. About midweek they decide to walk up and down the beach during their lunch hour. Halfway up the beach, they stumbled upon a lamp. As they rub the lamp a genie appears and says "Normally I would grant you three wishes, but since there are three of you, I will grant you each one wish."

The hardware engineer went first. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living in a huge house in St. Thomas with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him on off to St. Thomas.
The software engineer went next. "I would like to spend the rest of my life living on a huge yacht cruising the Mediterranean with no money worries." The genie granted him his wish and sent him off to the Mediterranean.
Last, but not least, it was the project manager's turn. "And what would your wish be?" asked the genie.
"I want them both back after lunch" replied the project manager.

The Motorist & the parrot

A motorist was driving down the highway and all of a sudden he hit a parrot.
He pulled over, picked the poor parrot who was still alive but unconscious.
He decided to take him home. When the motorist got home, he put the parrot in a cage, leaving him some bread and water inside.
When the parrot regained consciousness, he looked around and said:
"BARS, bread, water...Oh my God!! I have killed the motorist!" ........